There are many things in life that can affect your self-esteem from early on to later in life. Peer-group problems, grades you get in class, the way the instructor talks to you, problems in romance, overly critical parents etc can all have an affect on your self-esteem.
People with a healthy self-esteem see everyday set backs in life as something to worry about, for a short while then lets it go. People with low self-esteem, these ups and downs will be devastating to how one feels about themselves.
People with low or poor self esteem rely on what people tell them, including the critical that may or may not be constructive. People with low self-esteem will rely on how they are doing on a day to day basis and are constantly in search of positive experiences to rid themselves of negative feelings and thoughts that follow them constantly.
People with high self-esteem generally are capable of seeing themselves in an accurate light and know themselves very well, at least be able to accept themselves by acknowledging their weaknesses and strengths. They know they are worthy without others leveling conditions on them.
We start to build our self-esteem when we are children and it continues to evolve throughout our lives. We all paint images of ourselves based on the types of experiences we have growing up with success, failures, how our peers feel about us, how our parents feel about us etc. People with low self-esteem have a harsh inner voice that is extremely critical and belittling. They are their own worse critics.
There are types of self-esteem that have been identified. One is the Imposter, who acts on the outside at least, happy and confident when in reality, he is extremely frightened that someone may find out he is fibbing. He is the type of person that is going to need constant positive outcomes to maintain his mask. The Imposter will often become a perfectionist and is constantly under pressure to do well that he will eventually burn himself out at an early age with a nervous breakdown.
The second type is the Rebel. The Rebel acts as if he doesn’t care. He will think that the opinions of people of importance or prestige or the powerful doesn’t matter. This is likely to lead to an overbearing person; angry all the time because of not really feeling he is as good as everyone else and he may have a constant need to prove peoples’ judgments don’t hurt.
The third type of self-esteem is the loser. The loser just isn’t able to deal with the world and always waits for someone to rescue them. They won’t take responsibility for taking hold of their own life and will rely on feeling sorry for themselves, which can lead to dependency because they will always look to others for help.
To help increase your self-esteem, studies such as were done at the University of Texas stated the first thing to do is to start countering negative self-talk. Talk back to that negative self-talk. Nurture yourself. If for example you didn’t speak as well as you think you should have when giving a speech at an important gathering, you might want to think of it as a positive. O.k. so you didn’t do as well as you could have. You understood the material, you put thought into it, and you did the best that you could. You’ve done great in other speeches you make; you just had an off-day.
The third way to increase your self-esteem is to talk about it with your friends and family, those who you really trust. Vent to them and let them listen and ask them for their honest opinion of you.
Article Source: http://www.fitnesshealtharticles.com.
About the Author:
Conrad Raw is an expert in practical techniques for personal and spiritual development.
The Importance of Self Esteem
